Friday, 4 February 2011

For Your Eyes Only

As I sat at the foot of the Dolomites, with a fleece blanket and the strong sun peeping over the extremely large pine trees, listening to the therapeutic sound of "Swish Swoosh" of skis in my ears (not literally), I was truly thankful that I had said yes to a girls ski trip!  It's okay, please do read on...  I assure you that I am not here to gloat, like those people who constantly rub it in that they are off on holidays or just off work, or even just as sad as doing something nice, when you're not.  (You know the ones and okay, I'm sometimes guilty too!) 

I'm now not sat anywhere as nice - unless you count being in my bed on a school night with a fleece on and a minging nightie on a cold, rainy London night, glamorous.  I guess it could always be worse.  Anyway, the point is that, I knew the moment that our plane took off from Gatwick on a Sunday morning, at 9am and Miss Pussy Galore (for the purpose of this blog) ordered some beers and smokeless cigarettes, (yes cigarettes that you don’t light, but do smoke, and taste nothing like a cigarette - if they did, then I would be a full time smoker as I quite happen to like the taste of Hubba Bubba), that this trip was just what I needed.  It was time to step off the treadmill and click on my skis!

January – A month when Christmas has gone and a new you tries to emerge.  Gym memberships Rocket and Alcohol consumption is down (well not in our case).  A bit of a "no go" month in some accounts.  Not for me this year - I was determined to make my January fun and so when Pussy Galore called and invited me and Miss Money Penny (also for the purpose of this "fan dabi dozi" blog), to make full use of her friend’s apartment with Jacuzzi and hot tub - there was only one answer!  Yes!

I recommend a good old girly SKI trip to anyone and everyone!  Forget the beach holiday for now!  Well, that is if you want to laugh your head off till you can’t breathe, revive your very soul, let your hair down, find out new and fun things about your friends, find new nick names for them and an added bonus....  when you return you feel spoilt by the British weather – It’s actually Warm!  (in comparison!)

There is a time and place for everything, mind you!  A Ski trip with your man would probably be very nice...  Getting all cosy after a hard day on the slopes; i.e.: someone to rub your feet!, being wined and dined, someone to read your Piste Map for you, (as quite frankly that “pisted” me off) helping you up when you snow plant head first (instead of just laughing uncontrollably as friends like to do)  "This Wonderful man" would of course, be very sympathetic when you plunge off the Ski lift Pommer, into the barrier full speed singing to the “Woo Hoo’s of "Barbara Streisand" tunage and stop the whole thing working - He would also act as your Sherper (although Miss Money Penny did pull her weight with that title) he would of course not grumble and carry all of your things and drag you along when the slope runs to a straight bit ....Then there’s the massage, hot tubs, steam rooms and Jacuzzi.  But, as good as that sounds, nothing beats Après Ski with the Girls...

It’s funny how London Life seems so non-existent, when you leave it behind for a week.  Normally, it would be these snow capped mountains that I would be reading about but suddenly it was London that only existed in story books and Scary ones at that.... Jack the Ripper, Sweeny Todd and Oliver Twist. 

I had been told, pre holiday, that I must Ski the "James Bond" Route.  From Selva to Seceda!  I didn’t really care how edgy it was and how many snipers and explosions were around me or for that matter, or how much of a black route slope there was on route... I was skiing the “James Bond” Route and I wanted to find him!  Hands off Miss Pussy Galore – James is all Mine. 

I would say Hands off Miss Money penny too – but her hands were on nothing but a book that day – she insisted that she would stay at the apartment (not a fan of skiing as we have now found out.  Milton Keynes doesn’t really teach you the essence of skiing and all it stands for...) Not saying that I’m a pro but ...  I did learn to Ski at a young age in Pontypool on the dry ski slopes – Oh yes, carpet burns, a tuck and a plough to stop, has never failed me whilst on the snow!

Well, if James Bond was really called Iwan (from Ortisie) and a waiter in the middle of nowhere, in full Deer skin dressage, then I surely found him!
Infact, I believe that I quite possibly took his heart and if I stayed sitting drinking too many more gluvines, before midday, then he would have taken my heart too and I might just have to don some of those deer skin pants, put my hair in plaits and sing “Yodel Hoo”.  Infact, I think I spied a sniper in his hand aiming at a deer....  Time to Ski away I think.

Being away from Home with friends is as refreshing and as exhilarating as plunging into the snow head first!  All the eyes that I look in here are happy – or maybe it’s because I am stopping to look?!  What a mix of people and without knowing each other, we are sharing these, little yet spectacular moments that enrich the very soul!  It’s funny who you meet and where...  (Pontypool Weatherspoons is a blog for another day!)  People just ticking along in their life and you’ve no pre-determined plan to ever meet them, but there they are and they make your life, in some way, big or small, but they do and you have no choice in that really.   We have choice where we go – but not where a stranger go’s, so make sure you Go Go Go – (après)Ski(après) Ski(après) Ski, for you never know who you may bump in to.

So girls, your mission is this: Go and find your very own Miss Money penny and Pussy Galore's, because they are indeed hidden amongst your wonderful social circles of friends just awaiting to be found out.   Whilst, I don’t deny, 007 has his licence to kill, we must not forget that he is only fiction and what I found in my own story book beats any fictional or non fictional man any day of the week.  In a nut shell, it really is true girlfriends that bring around these unforgettable moments and they just don’t come every day. So ski after them for they are there waiting for us all, they are there “For Your Eyes Only”.

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